Code Blue to Blue's Clues

My friend, the Debt Ninja, over at Punch Debt In The Face, has issued us a challenge to complete his personal finance mad lib. When I first read that he had a mad lib, I was all excited at the prospect of filling in the blanks with "pussy" and "shit" like I did when I was in middle school. But alas, it seems that everyone else who's filled it out is taking it seriously, so I suppose I will too.

Hi my name is Kunsthure. I currently have 0 dollars in my wallet. When I started managing my finances I was worth oh, I dunno know, like -$25,000, and now have a net worth of somewhere around -$9100. I currently work as a stay-at-home mom and have been doing it for 2.5 years. I make roughly $0 (but my husband makes around $65K) per year. I want to have a hefty inheritance waiting for me when it comes time to retire. Aside from learning about finances, I really enjoy writing and watching TV. I think the world would be a better place if "Yo Gabba Gabba" didn't exist. I had curry rice with mushrooms and green peas for dinner last night and it was pretty damn good, if I do say so myself. I have had 4 significant others over the course of my lifetime (counting awkward middle school relationships). One thing that makes me different is I can bring people back from the dead. Now that I'm done with this mad lib, I think I'm going to put the kiddo to bed.